Just a thought

I know I meant to be writing (and I am), but I came across this scribble in my notes. It's what I believe in with a ridiculous passion and hope that I can help people understand this thought and make the most of where they live.
Home is the on-going story of you. Your yesterday, today and tomorrow all happen within the boundaries of where and how you live. Your home (besides the clothes on your back) is the most visual and emotional manifestation of your identity.
Sometimes you get to choose where you live. On other parts of your home journey, you won’t. Much of the time it’s a compromise, because of either financial or emotional restrictions. But whatever point you are at in your story, there is the chance to create your sense of identity, and by extension, your future.
And that's it from me I promise!


Maria said...

i think this reads beautifully until you really start to consider its implications. i think people who are in to "home" (decorating, reading these blogs, "making" their homes as a real hobby or interest) often fall into the trap of making their homes interesting instead of *being* interesting.

my house is full of flea market "finds," screened posters, beautiful handmade furniture.... all of it indicative of the things i like, the things i like to do. but none of it makes me more interesting. doesn't make me smarter, more compassionate, more patient. none of these external projections are actually me, no object makes me better. it's a fallacy that we can make our homes represent our identities. our homes are shelters and we fill them with *things* (or don't fill them, as in modernist design). but "making our homes" does NOT create for us an identity, nor does it reflect our "true selves" or the best parts of our nature. it creates for us a shield, a screen on which to project the identity we wish to have or to be seen having. but in making these homes we are often avoiding the real work of actually making those desired identities.

we are not our homes. we are not our things. we are our thoughts, our actions, our relationships, and the way we pursue people and passions. and while some of these things may be evident in our homes, it is not our homes that "better" us or even fully show who we are. my home is not my "story," it is a place i keep possessions. how terrible to think that that pile of possessions is "the most...emotional manifestation of [me]." shouldn't that honor/right/burden be placed on me, myself, and the person that i am and the person that i am to others, rather than a pile of boots and books and kitchenware?

Cassandra said...

Hi Maria

What a great and considered response. I do agree with you in that 'decorating' your home for decorating sake is not what makes you an interesting person - in fact, quite the opposite. I've been in many an interior designed home where the owner is disengaged from it, because it doesn't represent who they are or what their life has been about. I've also worked with homeless shelters where all the inhabitants care about (besides having a roof over their head) is the choice and opportunity to personalise where they live and be able to have an outward expression of who they are.

What I do believe is that some of our possessions, whether bought, found or passed down, do tell the story of who we are and what is important to us. The books we read, the chair we sit on, should be chosen or accepted because what is important to us. My family and dogs are more important to me than any individual possession I own, but the fact I can stare at a painting of a place I know and love, and eat from a plate that I found on a rare trip with my mother, I do think makes us partly who we are. We choose 'things' as much as we choose friends, jobs, experiences - well at least that's what I'd like people to do! Your right that things for the sake of things are unimportant, but 'things' that have an emotional meaning and importance to the individual whether a spoon, a tree or a library are important - in my humble opinion anyway!

roz said...

for me my home is an expression of me
in a very deep and personal way

in fact it helps me to know who i am
and is an evolving space

i am without a doubt affected by what surrounds me ..what i see and feel from this [ sensitive soul ]
tho certainly recognise that many of my family and friends do not share this same trait..
or the same interest in 'creating a space '

which for me is an expression of my creativity and individuality .. an expression of me and all who live here
thanks for the quote

pia said...

beautiful post, beautiful words, I'm always fascinated by how well you express these ideas, as though you've read my mind before the thoughts have developed into words (i.e. the feelings that come before the words). I'm so looking forward to the completion of your project, I cannot wait, it will be wonderful. Sending you lots of encouragement, and if you think I can be of help in any way, let me know. px

Cassandra said...

Thanks lovely Pia. I think my head is very clunky and are always a little frustrated that I can't express myself better! Yes I hope the book is as lovely as I want it to be. Thank you for the offer of help - you however have a baby to grow - and yourself to look after - I should be helping you! The book isn't out until next Autumn, but I'll send you one I promise. Cass x

Mademoiselle Poirot said...

That's a great post and really lovely thought. It really resonates wiht me as I might not live (London is so expensive) in the house I'd love, but since I have all my things with me - found, bought, collected, inherited - I can still be myself and feel very much at home. My home, even more than my clothes, reflect my real personality and love for art, crafts, interiors etc... Lovely blog :-) xo

mummyunders said...

Hello, I have just downsized (retired) into a smaller property and although it was a major move, it didn,t feel anything like home untill i started unwrapping and trying to place all those things i had aquired along lifes highway. Treasures passed on from long gone relatives. Presents from family and friends. Bargain finds at markets and shows and all the makes from down the years.
Now after 3 weeks, I am just starting to feel settled. Still lots to do but also more treasures to source in a new part of the country and more roots to put down and memories to make.
Yes I do believe our possesstions make us who we are. They are part of our history, something to cherish and hand down as our parents and grandparents handed things down to us.

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